You're not getting any younger: Part 2

God, I have so much to say about this, it could not be contained in a single blog post! The fucking stereotype that women need to get hitched while they are young and beautiful is so fucking degrading, I don't even know where to begin attacking it.

First of all, it is clearly sexist. No one ever says to a single guy, "You really outta find a lady, man. You're not getting any younger, ya know?" Why? B/c men's value and worth is not tied up in their physical appearance. I get guys have their own sexist social expectations put on them. Guys are supposed to be successful, have money, know how to fix things. I get that and I get it sucks. I'm just saying this is a clearly sexist stereotype about women and anyone who says it can fuck off.

Secondly, I really don't even understand the logic in this sentiment. As if once you are in a long-term, committed relationship or married that is an unbreakable bond. Um, people break up, people get divorced, people cheat on their significant others. How does me committing to someone now while I'm "young" protect me against this. It doesn't.

So, I might as well try to find someone I actually connect with and who actually likes me as a person. B/c guess what? I am only going to lose my youth and beauty! So, if that's the primary reason this guy is with me, well, I have kind of fucked myself, haven't I?

More on the differences between unfair gendered social expectations. Guys are supposed to be successful, have money, and be able to fix things, right? While, women are supposed to be nice and hot, right? So, ironically, women's figurative "stock" goes down as they age, while men's goes up. Ever notice how the 24 year old hottie gets divorced when she's 40 and her husband marries another 24 year old? Maybe 30 year old, but still. The 40 year old guy remarries a relatively hot younger woman in his 40s, 50s, or 60s b/c his figurative "stock" goes up with age, increased career success, and money.

Well, fuck that. I want no part in any of that bull shit. I don't want a guy for his money and I don't want to be wanted solely for my physical attractiveness. I want a guy I think is smart, funny, and attractive (and who is responsible with his money, however little or much of it he has) and who thinks the same about me. I get we will both lose our physical attractiveness as we age, but we will not lose the essence of who we are as people.

Okay. I think I'm done with this for now. More to come later perhaps. :)

You're not getting any younger you know.

Ooh, exciting! My first nasty message on my blog! Now I KNOW I'm big time! :D


So, here someone's comment on my lastest post "Skates Required."


So do you enjoy being alone? Because of the road you're going down, quickly. You may think you're better than everyone but there's a chance you are not. A good chance.

You shouldn't be so picky as to condemn yourself to a life of loneliness.

Also get away from OK zcupid and meet some real people in the flesh. Over or under 40! you're not getting any younger you know.

I'm sorry. When did I say I was better than anybody? Oohh! Was it when I did not agree to have sex with someone I was not physically or emotionally attracted to? How uppity of me.

"Do I enjoy being alone?" I enjoy my life for the most part. Right now I am not dating anybody. So, I suppose I do enjoy being alone. Would I like to meet someone who I respect, admire, think is funny smart, and attractive? Yes. That would be nice. That's why I am on okc. In the meantime, would I rather be alone than with someone who I'm not that into or who is not that into me? Yes. I would much rather be alone. I've dated someone who was not that into me before. It sucks! He emotionally jerked me around. I try to be more compassionate than that.

Do people I meet from okc "in the flesh" not count as "real"? I need more details on your definition of "real people."

Lastly, my favorite: I'm "not getting any younger." :> This fills me with joy. The goto dig at every woman in Western-freakin' civilization. CALL HER OLD. Niiiiiiiice. Classy. You're right. My most attractive years are far behind me. I am getting older and less physically attractive day by day. Somedays this makes me sad. Somedays I look in the mirror and think "God, I am old and ugly and no one will ever love me." Somedays I look in the mirror and think I'm pretty fly. Good thing I don't derive my only sense of worth and value from my physical appearance or else I'd be a bigger emotional wreck than I already am!

Well, I cannot control my aging process. I can only control my actions and decisions. I choose to go on dates with people I think I have a genuine interest in and fuck those I want to. I expect the same treatment. I think this is more likely to yield my desired dating results: find someone I share mutual affection, respect, and desire for. But, I could be wrong. Wouldn't be the first time.